just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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