I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
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