This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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