There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
