I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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