yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Randomize
