jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
