All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize