Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Randomize
