New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Randomize
