Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Randomize