I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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