What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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