You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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