Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
