it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Randomize
