perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
