quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
