I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Randomize
