Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
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