question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
