either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Randomize
