That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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