Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
i think my tv is drunk
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Randomize
