My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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