She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
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