When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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