JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
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