dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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