Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
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