I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
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