love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Randomize
