At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
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