I'm really into asian looking animals
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I think I won the penis lottery.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
Randomize
