And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize