Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
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