My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
