And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
third nipple confirmed
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
