You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Randomize
