Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Terrible idea I love it
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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