i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.