As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I want to be your penis for a week.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
