Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
Randomize
