So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize