hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Randomize
