Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I will die if light touches me.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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