Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
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