I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
