i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
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do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
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God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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