is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
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