Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
Randomize
