Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize